Letting Go of Negativity and Stress to Be a Better You in 2022
Rev. Dr. Kitty Boitnott, NBCT, RScP
Heart-Centered Career Transition & Job Search Coach | Life Strategies & Stress Management Coaching
A negative mind will never give you a positive life
It's challenging to be the best version of yourself if you are feeling stressed. Feeling any sort of negativity about your life or the world, in general, will drag you down. It is demotivating, to say the least.

Because hanging on to stress and feeling resentment from your past is also toxic, it's hard to reinvent yourself and live more joyfully when you are feeling down.

Managing stress is part of living your best life.

Letting go of resentment and finding ways to forgive yourself and others who may have hurt you allows you to grow. If you want to live your best life, you need to start employing habits that will enable you to do that. You will need to exercise, for example. You will want to look for things for which to be grateful. And you should start hanging out with more positive and supportive people.

You may be thinking that all this sounds like a lot of work. After all, like any habit, hanging on to resentment is something you have to quit doing, and that may take time and effort.

You can do different things to help yourself quit your self-sabotaging behaviors. For example, start with reframing negative perspectives into positive ones.

Every cloud has a silver lining, after all.

It may feel daunting at first, but you are singularly able to change your way of thinking so that you turn a life that feels dark and heavy into one of light and happiness.

Start by Letting Go of Grudges


Dont waste your time in anger, regrets, worries and grudges

There are times in our lives when we feel offended by people in our lives. It is especially tough to forgive those we hold most dear when we believe they have betrayed us or let us down in some way.


But forgiveness is precisely what is needed because not forgiving someone creates more of a burden for you than the other person. Your hanging on to a grudge doesn't hurt the other person. It only hurts you.

Many times, holding onto your grudges isn't really intentional — people don't know how to let go of the sense of hurt and betrayal they feel. There are a few things you might do, however, to help you if you find yourself needing to forgive someone in your life.

Express Yourself

Communicate with the person in question to help them understand the depth of your pain. Do this without using any threatening language. For example, use "I" instead of "you" statements.

Another option is writing a letter and burning it or tearing it up.


This option is best recommended if you're skeptical about addressing the situation in person. You may feel that confronting the person in question will only make things worse.


Remember that forgiveness is more about you than them. So get it out of your system one way or another and move one.

Look for the Positive in Your Life


Close-up of gratitude word with pen on notebook

Forgive a little every day. Keep an ongoing gratitude journal. Looking for things to be grateful for can help you see the positive things around you instead of the negative.

Cultivate Empathy for Others

Everyone makes mistakes. It might help to put yourself in the other person's shoes. Think about the good things that person has done. Consider the possibility that their actions weren't intended to hurt you.

Get Help If (When) You Need It

Consider seeking out a professional therapist if you need help with your effort to forgive and let go.

Drop Your Negative Attitudes about Yourself or Others

If you find yourself belittling or berating yourself, remind yourself of your many successes in life. If you have a habit of negating your own abilities, it's high time you took steps to stop that.

Say No to Toxic Relationships

This has already been said in previous posts, but it bears repeating. A toxic relationship is like a virus that corrupts you and your personality. So, make sure you let go of unhealthy relationships because they can be very harmful.

Practice Self-Care in Every Realm of Your Life


Lightbox with motivation words for self-car

Self-care is the deliberate act of promoting your emotional, mental, and physical health. For example, if you're not sleeping well, meditation won't help. Similarly, if you refuse to take care of yourself, no stress relief activity can work for you. So what should you do for self-care?

Physical Self-Care

You'll think and feel better when you care for your body. This is simply because your mind and your body are strongly connected. Good physical self-care cuts across managing your health. It includes taking your prescribed medications and attending doctors' appointments. It means caring for your physical needs, exercising, and getting enough sleep.

Social Self-Care

For the sake of your well-being, you need to form close connections. And you need to commit to taking care of your relationships like you take care of yourself. Self-care is the key to socialization. Because of that, you should work to build your relationships with other people.

Mental Self-Care

Your psychological well-being is greatly influenced by what you fill your mind with and what and how you think—practicing self-compassion and engaging in things that help to improve your mental health. For example, engage in activities doing things like watching uplifting movies, reading motivational books, and solving puzzles. These are a few examples of taking care of your mental state.

Spiritual Self-Care

Everyone has a spiritual nature. Some fill the need in themselves with religious faith. Others seek out less didactic practices with a variety of spiritual practices. Spiritual self-care may include praying, meditating, attending a religious service or a combination of these. Find an approach that satisfies you.

Emotional Self-Care

Sadness, anxiety, and anger are examples of uncomfortable emotions that we all have to learn to manage with healthy coping skills. This self-care involves engaging in activities that will help you own, control, and convey your emotions.


The way to become a better "you" in 2022 is to take control of every aspect of your life. Be grateful for the parts that are working. Take steps to address the parts that are not. And seek out help when you need it.


You have heard it said that life is a journey, not a destination. We are all works in progress. But our best lives are lived when we are working to be the best versions of ourselves that we can be. Letting go of negativity and stress in your life is a great place to start.


Until next time.



Vanessa Jackson
Phoenix Rising Coaching
1541 Flaming Oak
New Braunfels Texas 78132
United States of America